Custom of catching a husband

      Buffaloes are among the more important betrothal gifts from a woman’s family to a man’s family if the young woman wants to catch the man to be her husband. “Catching a husband” sounds strange to us, but it is a cultural custom that has existed for a very long time in some Vietnamese minorities in which women must catch their husbands.
Among the ethnic groups of E De, J’rai and K’ho, when young girls reach puberty they will look for a husband. When she finds a man that she likes, the girl will inform her family about her prospective husband. After reaching an agreement, the girl’s parents will make an offering to Heaven with a jar of wine and a bronze bracelet to wish for success and happiness, and then go with a matchmaker to the future groom’s house to ask for a husband for their child.
In the groom’s family all relatives will gather to discuss the arrangement. If there is mutual consent among them, they will exchange a bracelet with the bride’s family and offer them a feast with wine, and exact their wedding presents. The betrothal gifts demanded will traditionally include a gong, one or two buffaloes and clothes made of brocade. The bride’s family is responsible for all the wedding costs.
About three to seven days after the wedding ceremony, the couple will visit the groom’s family for several days, and then return to the bride’s house, where they will live for the rest of their lives.